So… it’s been one year since I started this blog. I know it’s been a year because I had just recieved the bill to renew my WordPress subscription. In the span of the last year, I’ve written a total of 3 posts–one of which was my “welcome to this blog” post. Good job, me?
I suppose trying to maintain a website while being knee-deep in game dev work and the crypto scene (which, everyone knows, never sleeps) was kind of a bad idea. I originally started this website because I wanted to maximize the use of my domain name and make a feeble attempt at carving out my own little place on the internet.
Well, now that I’m a little bit freer to work on my own projects, I figured one of the things I can do is to keep this website a bit more updated. Since I’ve slowly been getting back to writing comics again, this shouldn’t be too big of a problem. Hello, content!
Speaking of comics, if you’ve been following me on Twitter, then you have probably seen this ‘comic prototype’ I recently posted (or not, because algorithm~). It’s a prototype because I’m still testing out whether it’s a look I’m satisfied with and if it’s a style I can reproduce at a more sustainable pace.
You see, when I first started making diary comics in 2016 (you can still view these on Tapas), I didn’t really have too many plans for it to go anywhere—a recurring pattern in my pursuits, it seems. I initially intended to make them as a form of stress relief: a personal project unrelated to my game dev work that I could do on the side. Next thing I knew, my comic got featured on the site, and suddenly my little side project was getting a lot more popular than I ever expected it to be.
That sudden popularity became a double-edged sword for me. On one hand, I thought that “hey, maybe I can actually do this for a living.” On the other… well, I didn’t just get fans. I also got a substantial number of haters. Given that my mental health back then wasn’t the best, I was susceptible to the negative comments that got thrown my way—one of which was that I was a ‘bad artist’ because of the cartoon-y and simplistic style of the comic. I, being a dumbass, tried to prove my haters wrong by ‘updating’ the art style to make it look more consistent and professional. Which, of course, ended up making it unsustainable to create on a regular basis since I had a full-time job.
Now that I’m in a much better state of mental health, I’ve realized that… well, wow. What was I thinking? Why did I even want to prove anything to people who never really liked me or my work in the first place?
Looking back now, I can’t blame myself either because I had never really had that much experience being popular on the internet before. It was kind of a relief when I started and sort of stayed as a relative nobody in the cryptoart scene.
But I digress, and wow that was a lot of words to say that I’ve learned my lesson. In the realm of comics I’m still pretty much a beginner, so I am allowing myself to be a beginner again. If I want to achieve any form of success in this realm, I need to be willing to make a lot of bad comics to get to the good ones. And maybe removing some of the ‘friction’ in that process—like trying to make it look the best it can be—will help me focus on what makes good comics good: the writing.
So… be prepared for a lot of bad comics again. It’s going to be great.